Books Nineteen through Twenty-two-- Anita Blake by Laurell K Hamilton

Guilty Pleasures
265 pages
The Laughing Corpse
293 pages
Circus of the Damned
329 pages
The Lunatic Cafe
369 pages
supernatural detective fiction
by Laurell K Hamilton


You know how I said I was going to review Anatham next? Yeah, I lied. For one thing, I'm totally intimidated; I doubt I can do it justice. For another thing, well I'm kind of depressed and so I holed up in bed yesterday and today and read four rather dreadful books, one right after the other. Somewhere in there I slept a fair amount as well.

Mind you, I didn't go out and buy these; it seems a certain person I'm married to went on a kick several years ago and so we have a whole stack of them on the shelf. I grabbed the first one because...well, because I didn't want to have to think or read anything complicated.

Anyway, I'm not going to go into a huge amount of detail on these; they don't really deserve it and I just want to get them on the list and move on, hopefully to a much better, brighter day.

Guilty Pleasures is utter "how the hell did this woman ever get published" crap. In it Hamilton introduces Anita Blake, animator--means she can raise the dead--and vampire hunter and sets up her world, in which supernatural creatures are real and the public knows about them. To be honest, she does a crappy job of world-building; I just can't buy some of the changes she makes in the legal system, but whatever. In this one, Anita is hired by the chief vampire of the city--St. Louis, which apparently is vampire central--to find someone who's illegally killing vampires. In the middle of all this, Jean-Claude, owner of a vampire strip club called Guilty Pleasures , ends up putting two of the four "marks" that can turn a person into a "human servant" on Anita. Jean-Claude is an arrogant asshole who calls Anita "ma petite" and the fact that I think we're supposed to find him sexy is just another strike against the book. The mystery isn't all that complicated and the writing is stilted; Hamilton is better than Stephanie Meyers, but that's about all I can say for her.

The Laughing Corpse pits Anita against a Mexican voodoo queen while investigating a number of truly grisly murders. Oh yeah, there's also some rich guy who wants Anita to raise a zombie, only the zombie's been dead long enough that a human sacrifice will be required and Anita won't do it. On top of it all, there's the annoying Jean-Claude, now Master of the City, who's being threatened because he can't even keep his human servant in line. He keeps after Anita, trying to convince her to let him put the rest of his marks on her so, presumably, she can spend the rest of an unnaturally long life dealing with a condescending jerk. Anita's not exactly my favorite fictional character ever, but honestly, I can't blame her for trying to avoid this clown. Of the four books I read, this is actually the best one--the plot moves along nicely, the writing's smoothed out some and the mystery is actually fairly complicated. I'd say that if you had to read one of these books, this would be the one to read.

Circus of the Damned has Anita dealing with what looks like a rogue gang of vampires on a killin' spree. However, near as I can tell, the main purpose of this book is to introduce us to Richard, the junior high teacher who also happens to be a were-wolf. And here's where I say, with all due sincerity, Laurell, honey? Stick to the action/adventure genre and leave the romance writing to someone, anyone, else. Reading Anita and Richard flirting is enough to make you want to kill yourself. It's not the painful but realistic flirting of two people who aren't supposed to be good at it; on no, this is supposed to be cute and snappy. Also, there's more Jean-Claude, who manages to put his third mark on Anita, but then, after the final battle with more rogue vampires, removes all his marks. Whatever, he's still a tool. This one isn't nearly as good as Laughing Corpse; it's not a mystery so much as a little action/adventure and a lot of romantic set up.

The Lunatic Cafe is the werewolf novel. Well, there are other were-creatures as well, but in this one, there's a mysterious death by critter and also some icky were-creature snuff porn floating around. Mostly, though, it's about Anita trying to deal with her relationship with Richard, the sensitive New Age were-wolf. Also there's a ton of posturing; seriously, there's this one meeting with several were-creatures that's pages and pages of people talking about dominance and who's in charge. I kinda wanted to scream "I fucking get the point, okay?" but it wouldn't have done any good. Also, yes, there's more Jean-Claude, this time he demands equal dating rights or he's gonna take Richard out even if it means that Anita will come gunning for him. The mystery part of this one is only so-so, but I don't think you're really supposed to care because this is all about setting up the big love triangle.

Part of my problem with these books is that I rarely like anyone in them. There are a few side characters--a couple of cops and Anita's private detective BFF--who aren't bad, but that's just not enough. Some authors can make unlikeable characters work, but you have to be much better at the craft than Hamilton is. In the end, I just don't care about Anita, or which of her two annoying suitors she picks or what her next supernatural case may be.

I have no idea what I'm reading next, but I know it'll be better than these four books.

Also, OMG is that like the cheesiest cover in the history of...well, forever?

PS. Also? I can't count.